


Peace and Purpose

by sea



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Genre: Dragon Age Kink Meme, F/M, Marriage, The Chantry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-07
Updated: 2015-02-07
Packaged: 2018-03-10 23:53:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 4,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3307877
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sea/pseuds/sea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>F!Hawke and Sebastian enter into a chaste marriage. It becomes difficult for them to keep it chaste.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> DA!KINK MEME PROMPT:
> 
> Smitten!Hawke quickly agrees to the chaste marriage, figuring that it's the only way she'll be close to Sebastian. He's equally thrilled.
> 
> It seems simple enough, but the more time they spend together, the more they start finding everything the other does sexually stimulating (i.e. Sebastian fletching his arrows or Hawke cleaning her blade, etc). It only becomes worse when they touch by hugging, holding hands....kisses that aught to be innocent turn anything but.
> 
> I want to see Hawke and Sebastian trying desperately to contain themselves, falling a little too deep into their affections before realizing, 'whoops, too far'. They eventually become so frustrated they give in, all the while doing the whole 'Yes! No! YES! How can this be so bad if it feels so good???' sort of thing.

Marrying Sebastian had been one of the best things Hawke had ever done. She had gotten a wonderful, dutiful husband that cared for her deeply. When he asked her she agreed right away to a "chaste marriage". Who was she to expect him to break his vows for her? As much as he might love her and she him, he was a dedicated man and that was one of the things she most admired about him. Hawke had never thought she would be able to have Sebastian in any way and she thought being with him in any capacity would be enough for her.

But marrying Sebastian had turned out to be one of the most frustrating things Hawke had ever done. She admitted it was a rash decision, but she was a woman very much in love and just as much infatuated with the handsome archer. Joining the Chantry hadn't made things easier like she'd thought. Neither one of them were virgins and it was only human to have _urges_ though they never spoke of it.

Hawke tried to fill her days helping those that needed it in the Chantry as well as still taking on small quests for the people of Kirkwall. Anything she could do to keep busy. But in the evening she still found herself in the silence of the Chantry sitting amongst the pews on the upper level.

Hawke eyed Sebastian below speaking with the Grand Cleric about something. He was idly tapping his fingertips against the spine of the book sitting on the podium. She watched the pad of his thumb slowly run its way up the edge of the hardback and back down again as if he were petting it. She felt a slight shiver run through her as she imagined what it would be like feeling his bow calloused fingers touching her in that manner. Feeling them float across her naked back touching every inch of her body. Shifting slightly in her seat she tried to push the thoughts from her head. This was not helping. As if he had heard her internal dialogue, Sebastian glanced up at her and smiled. Hawke returned it feeling her heart clench a little in her chest. He could still make her melt with just a small smile.

Sighing she leaned back against the pews and ran her fingers through her hair. Celibacy was difficult. Far harder than she thought it would be. She had gone for months without sex before. Even years when she first moved to Kirkwall. There had been a small fling on one drunken night at the Hanged Man, but she could barely even remember it. But years of pining after Sebastian and having him without _having him_ was starting to wear on her.

Sebastian approached the row of pews where Hawke was sitting deep in thought. Her look was of frustration, confusion, and something else he couldn't quite place. Sliding next to her he took her hand in his.

"Is something bothering you, my love?" He spoke when she looked at him.

"Mmm..?" She replied a bit dazed. "It's nothing. Just tired."

She could feel the heat of his palm steadily warming her own as she gazed into his bright blue eyes. He offered her another small smile when he spoke. "Are you sure?"

"Yes," She stated simply. Hawke pulled her hand back from his gently and leaned back against the wooden bench, stretching slightly. He stood and offered her his hand again inviting her to stand with him. She took it and he pulled her to him wrapping his strong arms around her. Even with the hard pointy bits of his armor almost digging into her she felt so comfortable in his embrace. Laying her head on his shoulder she closed her eyes for a moment, relishing the feel and scent of him. So uniquely Sebastian.

"Well then," He said his accented voice shaking her a bit from her daze. She could feel his words rumble out of his chest. "Let's get go put you to bed."

From anyone else those words would have been clear in their intent, but it was Sebastian and he didn't _do_ innuendo. This was obvious the first time she flirted with him mentioning something about knowing some "services" he could perform. He'd blushed so hard once he actually caught on that she still laughed at the thought of it.

Sebastian walked her to her room in silence. Leaning against the jamb as she unlocked the door. He leaned in and brushed his lips softly against the apple of her cheek.

"Goodnight, my love," He whispered against her. Hawke felt her eyelids flutter at the feel of him so close to her wanting nothing more than to drag him into her room, throw him onto the bed, and have her way with him.

"Night," She said quickly entering her room and shutting the door so quickly she feared she may have slammed Sebastian's face in it. When she heard no noise of distress she relaxed what little she could and walked over to her wardrobe.

As she changed into her night clothes she thought about it. He wasn't doing this to her on purpose was he? No. Sebastian was one of the most kind and giving men she had ever known. He was virtuous and loving and kind. Yes, kind. But how could he be so oblivious? How could he not know how much was torturing her? Did he feel nothing like she felt? After a while the thoughts slowed and Hawke was able to drift into sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

Sebastian never thought he would fall in love. When he was younger all he cared for was sex and drink. Love never factored into anything. If there was attraction that was it. He never spoke more than a few words to the women that he slept with. He was sure they had nothing in their heads but the lewd thoughts he did and back then he wouldn't have cared either way.

When his parents sent him to the Chantry Sebastian _knew_ he would never fall in love. He took his vows and cared only for life as a brother. He never needed to think about love or anything else besides how to serve the Maker the best that he could. Until his parents were murdered, until he met Hawke. The beautiful, sarcastic, somewhat inappropriate woman that sought justice against a whole mercenary group for a complete stranger. The one that made him realise he only _thought_ he knew he would not fall in love.

Things had changed for him since he met her. He wanted nothing more than to shirk his duties to the Chantry and run away with Hawke leaving everything behind. The thought of that scared him more than anything. It sounded too close to the boy he used to be not the man he'd become. So he pushed thoughts of Hawke aside. He helped her when she asked and he continued to serve the Chantry when she didn't.

Hawke had nothing but support for Sebastian. Whenever he doubted his vows or purpose she was there to bolster his confidence. He had no doubt that if he had said he wanted to go back to Starkhaven she would have encouraged that as well. So when he finally made his decision to stay in Kirkwall and she seemed so pleased he couldn't help himself. And she had said yes against all odds. Sebastian never thought he could have everything, but he did and so much more.

He spotted her in the pews above. Her hair had fallen over her face, but he could still see her eyes shining at him. He smiled at her, his beautiful bride. Sebastian tapped his fingers impatiently against the book in front of him. Willing his conversation with the Grand Cleric to be over so that he could spend time with Hawke.

He watched quietly as she leaned back out of sight. Saying his goodbyes to the Grand Cleric as soon as he saw an opening he left to go see her.

Sebastian didn't believe her when she said that nothing was wrong. He knew it was something. But he also knew that Hawke was more likely to get annoyed with him than tell him if he pressed her on it.

He watched her fingers leave his hand when she pulled away trying not to be hurt by it. As she leaned back and stretched his eyes lingered on her chest lifted in the air by the soft arch of back. Sebastian blushed a little and averted his gaze. Thankfully she didn't notice, but he scolded himself internally for the slight stirring he felt in his trousers.

He silently walked her to her room. As he pressed his lips against her cheek he tried to push the inappropriate thoughts aside. Her lips were too close. If he just moved his head down a little he would be able to taste them. Before his thoughts could go further she was gone and the door was closed. Sebastian was thankful that she had left so abruptly before he had a chance to lose all self control and take her against the door of her bedroom. In the back of his mind he wondered if he had offended her, maybe he'd lingered too long in her personal space? He shook his head and left for his own room.


	3. Chapter 3

The next morning Sebastian rapped his knuckles lightly against Hawke's door.

"Mmph nnn," He heard in response. Without hesitation he pushed the door open and stepped inside closing it behind him.

"Sebastian!" Hawke screamed. He turned away from her naked torso as quick as he could manage. Blushing she tried to cover herself up, more out of shock than actual modesty.

"Hawke," He stuttered. "I'm s-so sorry. I thought you said 'come in'."

"I said 'hold on'!" She replied securing her breast band in place. "You can turn around now." He turned slowly to face her.

"Um. Hawke. You're still not clothed," Sebastian muttered pointing at her dumbly.

"I realise that, Sebastian. But at least I'm not naked. Now was there something you needed?" She replied pulling an undershirt over her head. Sebastian tried not to stare at her exposed skin, but he wanted nothing more than to reach out and touch it, touch her.

"Huh?" Was all that he could manage. Hawke sighed at him and lifted an eyebrow.

"As adorable as it is to think that you've never seen a woman naked before I think we both know it's not true," She smirked.

"Yes. Right." Sebastian cleared his throat. "I came to see if you would like to accompany me for breakfast in the market today."

"That sounds lovely and good morning, by the way," She smiled at him. Walking over she leaned up to him to kiss him on the cheek. He turned his head at the same time and their lips met briefly. She pulled away quickly, but he followed her pressing his lips against her's again harder this time. Her lips parted out of shock and Sebastian deepened the kiss. Minutes passed before he pulled away, his eyes looking everywhere but at her.

He cleared his throat again. "I beg your pardon, Hawke. I don't know what came over me." When she didn't respond he chanced a look at her taking in her flushed cheeks and kiss swollen lips. She was beautiful and he felt his body buzzing with desire and heat.

"Maybe it's best that I leave," Sebastian spoke again. When Hawke didn't respond this time he turned and exited the room as quickly as his legs would take him.

Still in a daze Hawke lifted her hand to her mouth tracing her lips with her fingertips. She smiled to herself. So he did feel what she felt.

Sebastian leaned against the outside of Hawke's door trying to catch his breath. He knew he was slipping. He loved Hawke and wanted to spend as much time with her as he possibly could, but it seemed to be causing complications.

Before Hawke he didn't feel desire for anyone. Abstaining from sex was easy enough. But now. Having her around all the time with her gorgeous, full lips and slender figure, he was having trouble focusing on his prayers and contemplation. His thoughts more increasingly turned to her. Thoughts of how many times and ways he could have her in one night. And now that he'd all but seen her naked, the thoughts bubbled up more frequently. He laid awake at night thinking of her taking himself in his hand at the thought of her lithe, naked form next to his.

His thoughts (and hand) were interrupted by a soft knock at his door. He scrambled to sit up and arrange the blankets to cover his obvious arousal.

"Yes," he coughed as his voice cracked. "Come in!"

Hawke eased the door open slowly and inched herself inside enough to quietly close it behind her.

"Hi," She said coyly, smiling at him. Sebastian couldn't help the goofy smile that plastered itself across his face at the sight of her.

"Hi."

"What are you doing?"

"Well, I was..." He hesitated searching for what to say that wouldn't make him sound vulgar. "Getting ready for bed."

"Want to go for a walk?" The coy smile still played at her lips.

"Now? Isn't it a little late for that, Hawke?"

"So what? You can't tell me that you've never snuck out after hours before. Come on! It will be an adventure!" The enthusiasm in Hawke's voice was infectious.

"All right, all right. You've convinced me. I'll meet you outside in a few minutes," He said, giving in. He could never really say no to her. That was obvious from the amount of times he ran off with her to chase down maleficarum or a group of thugs bothering patrons in the Hanged Man. But to Hawke's credit she never chose to pursue a cause that was not worthy and so he never wanted to say no anyway.


	4. Chapter 4

As soon as he stepped foot outside the Chantry Sebastian felt his hand in Hawke's as she took off running dragging him along.

"Where are we going?" Sebastian laughed as he tried to keep up without tripping.

"Anywhere we want!" She replied giggling like a child. They ran through Hightown fingers laced. Sebastian repeatedly had to tell Hawke to keep it down because people were sleeping. She finally slowed as they reached the empty marketplace giving him a chance to catch his breath.

"Look!" She squealed dropping his hand and pointing. She rolled her eyes as Sebastian whispered a hushed shhh at her and ran over to where she had been pointing. Leaning over Hawke plucked a single silver from the stone ground. She showed it to him beaming. The moonlight caught on it causing it to glitter and gleam in her small hand.

Sebastian's cheeks were beginning to hurt from smiling at her. There was a light in her eyes that he hadn't seen in a while and he momentarily wondered just how much freedom she'd given up to be with him. He grabbed her in his arms and held her tight.

"Shebshenn," She mumbled into his shoulder. "I cnnn brthh." He released his hold on her slightly, allowing her lift her head and look him in the eye. "What was that for?"

"I love you," He replied leaning down to kiss her lightly on the forehead.

"You're not getting that silver! So you can stop trying to butter me up right now," Hawke said putting on an expression of mock offense.

He just kept smiling as he pressed a chaste kiss against her warm lips. She sighed under him and kissed him back. The kiss quickly changed from an innocent peck to hungry, raw, passion. Hawke moaned into his mouth as she felt Sebastian's tongue enter her own. He slowly slid his hand from where it had been positioned on her hip to graze over her breast. Even through her clothes it made her shiver with want. She used all her strength and self control to pull back.

"Wait..." She mumbled before he captured her lips. "This isn't right!" She whispered when she managed to pull away again.

"I know," He spoke against her jaw between kisses. "But why does it feel so?" He brought his hands to her face and cupped it looking into her eyes. "I can't stop thinking about you. I love you. It is a love so pure and untarnished. The Maker knows this. I cannot fathom why He would believe this to be wrong. This." Sebastian repeated as he brushed his lips against her's again. They held each other in silence for a moment. Just enjoying each other's embrace.

"I have something to show you," Hawke said breaking the silence. "Come with me." She led him by the hand to the ivy covered door of the Amell Estate. Even though she mostly spent her nights at her room in the Chantry, Hawke couldn't bear to give up the family estate her mother had worked so hard to reacquire. After wrestling with the lock in the dark for a minute or two she managed to push the door open.

Sebastian had not been to the estate since they had married. It was dark except for the small glow coming from the fireplace. It was also quiet and he suddenly missed the chorus of cheerful voices that used to greet him when he came to visit. Sebastian sighed at the nostalgic thought and he felt a little nudge at his lower back. Hawke pushed him further into the room shutting the door behind them and locking it.

"Come on," Hawke whined pulling at his arm. She sprinted up the stairs into her old bedroom.

"What's all this?" Sebastian asked as he entered the bedroom looking around. On the floor in front of the bed there was a blanket spread out with plates of different cheeses and bread and fruits, a bottle of wine, two glasses, and Hawke sitting atop it.

"Breakfast! Well, since we didn't manage to get breakfast together the other day. I just thought..." Hawke hesitated. "Unless of course you don't like it? In which case, we can leave right now and forget about it." Sebastian had been quiet and Hawke struggled to fill the silence as she usually did.

"I love it, but I don't remember the last time I had wine at breakfast." He chuckled and moved to sit down with her on the blanket.

She threw a piece of bread at him hitting him above his right eye. "Ow. You hurt me," He said pouting and bringing a hand to his forehead.

"Oh I'm sorry," she replied in a mock sympathetic voice. She crawled over to where he was sitting. "Let me make it all better." She leaned up and pressed a lingering kiss gently against the spot just above his eyebrow. Then another, then a kiss on the cheek, then his jaw, then his lips. Hawke felt him still beneath her and smiled to herself. She slid her hand into his hair fingers running along the nape of his neck as she deepened the kiss. He groaned against her mouth.

Sebastian pulled away looking at her questioningly. "What are we doing? Why is this so difficult?" He paused to stare into her eyes, doubt filling his. "Before you I never even thought about breaking my vows. I was a good brother. But now you're all I think about and I can't pretend to not have the lustful thoughts I do. Not when I see you bending over to pick silvers off the ground or cleaning your daggers. All I want to do is take you right there and hear you scream my name."

Hawke blushed at the last sentence. Sebastian quickly spoke again. "I'm sorry, my love. That was highly inappropriate. I hope I have not offended you."

"Cleaning my daggers?" Hawke replied finally her tone full of snark.

Sebastian cleared his throat. "It can look very...suggestive."

"I can think of more suggestive things," she said smirking.

"I have no doubt." He laughed and then she was on him again kissing him fervently. Neither one resisted this time, giving in to the feel of each other.


	5. Chapter 5

Sebastian's hands moved of their own accord wanting to feel every inch of her. Hawke moved from Sebastian's embrace long enough to lift his tunic above his head. He shed it without a thought and resumed kissing her passionately. His hands moved along the hem of her shirt tugging it upwards as well. She lifted her arms for him to slide it off of her. Sebastian gasped when he realised she wore nothing beneath it. She smiled sweetly at him.

Taking in the view of her milky skin and beautiful breasts he wanted nothing more than to feel her against him. He leaned forward and gently laid her back down against the blanket with his body. She could feel his arousal pressing into her thigh through the cloth of his trousers. Hawke rubbed her thigh up against him causing him to gasp. Using his shock to her advantage she rolled them so that she was on top.

Hakwe leaned forward pressing a kiss to his toned chest. Sebastian's body was a marvel. The years of archery had toned his muscles without making him bulky, his skin was beautifully tanned, and he had the lightest sprinkling of hair on his chest. Hawke kissed her way further down. Stopping momentarily to kiss lightly around his ribs. A spot that she found to be very ticklish. She stopped teasing and continued her way down until she reached the hem of his trousers. She yanked gently at them before he lifted up and allowed her to remove them along with his smalls.

Hawke hummed to herself taking in the size of him. Licking her lips she leaned down and pressed a soft kiss against the tip of his length. Sebastian groaned at the light touch. She swiped her tongue along his shaft from base to tip before taking him in her mouth. Sebastian groaned again as she began to move her mouth up and down his length, pausing at the top to flick her tongue against the head. He was getting close far faster than he would have hoped.

"Hawke nnng" He managed as he grasped at her hair. "I won't last much longer if you keep going. Come here." Hawke lifted her head to look at him as he pulled her up against him. He rolled them back over and leaned down to capture her lips again running his tongue along her bottom lip as she opened her mouth to him. He stroked her tongue with his own and slid his hand down between them stroking the pad of his thumb over her hardened nipple. She moaned into his mouth and was rewarded with another stroke. He finally left her mouth to suck the other bud into his warm mouth, flicking his tongue against it lightly as his hand traveled down between her legs. Sebastian rubbed at her through the cloth still covering her feeling the moisture already soaking through it. He removed them from her stopping to kiss her belly gently as Hawke giggled and swatted at him.

He finally removed her small clothes lingering to take in the scent of her before moving back up her body. Sebastian positioned himself at her entrance and hesitantly gazed down at her. Hawke pushed her hips forward bringing him into her heat. Sebastian nearly cried out at the sudden feel of her tight walls surrounding him.

"Maker," he moaned. Hawke rolled her hips against his urging him to move. Sebastian moved slowly and deliberately and she moaned at the torturous pace. Hawke lifted her hips to meet him trying to take as much of him inside her as she could. Sebastian began to speed up pulling almost all the way out before slamming back into her. Hawke cried out. She moaned his name desperately clutching at him and tightening her thighs around his hips.

Hawke couldn't remember the last time she felt so complete. It was as if Sebastian were made only for her. The way he moaned her name softly against her ear, the way he filled her perfectly, the way their bodies moved together so seamlessly. As Sebastian approached his end he reached between them to find her clitoris. She arched into him as he rolled it gently between his thumb and index finger. Years of want and desire washed over her. She finally had it, had him. Hawke let the pleasure overtake her and she gave in to it, feeling the release burst through her as her walls contracted around Sebastian. He couldn't last any longer when he felt her body respond to him. He groaned loudly as he spilled himself deep inside her, thrusting into her lazily a few more times as he came down from his orgasm.

Sebastian shifted slightly and began to move away before Hawke pulled him back again. "Just wait...please?" They stayed intwined until she felt him softening inside her when she allowed him to pull out and shift to lie beside her. He pulled her into his chest cradling her gently.

"I..." Hawke began to say. She felt the need to say something, but no words could express how she felt. She felt content, she felt alive, she felt love. Hawke thought that she could never have Sebastian in the way she really wanted him - no restrictions, no limitations. She had resigned to the fact that she would only get as much as she was being offered and she was fine with that.

"I know," Sebastian smiled when she failed to continue. He was completely unsure about how things would go for him now that he'd broken his vows. Especially because he knew it would not just be the one time. Sebastian gazed down as Hawke's eyes began to flutter before finally closing and he suddenly wasn't worried. He had her and Sebastian knew that no matter what he faced he could overcome it with Hawke at his side. She offered him peace and she gave him a purpose.


End file.
